Taking a Look Back

Yesterday I decided to go back and look at some of my posts.  There were so many things I forgot about; small, mundane, everyday things that I commented on in my blog--what treasures they are.  I keep a journal but somehow this blog goes into more detail about specific situations and topics plus there is the added dimension related to the satisfaction I get from creative writing.

Looking back shows me that last year, 2010, was more than an interesting year; if I had to classify it or give it a theme I would call it the "year of ups & downs".  Between May and early July we kicked up our heels at two weddings, hosted a 50th wedding anniversary and attended four funerals.  We cancelled our holidays in mid July when it became clear that another friend was losing her battle against breast cancer; it was a privilege to help both her and her husband during her final days.  The following week after her death and before her memorial I wrote her obituary, her memorial program (got a job offer to do memorial programs from the printer) and compiled a book of memories for her parents and her husband.  In November, I revisited the memory book and added a number of my personal thoughts and some of the more difficult conversations that we had.  It was cathartic for me, a way to grieve and let go.

A lot of the last part of 2010 and early 2011 was taken up with the projects at my work like starting to help design a new hospital as well as my involvement with the Federation of BC Writers and the creation of their website.  There are a couple of things I probably should have blogged about.  There was the time I spent over the winter holidays going through the last of the boxes we had packed in preparation for moving to Kamloops.  I don't think I kept more than one item out of each box since I reasoned that if I hadn't missed the items for a year I'd be safe getting rid of them.  Doing that felt like a huge weight off my shoulders and it brought with it a sense of closure.  Then another day Bruce got out his nails & hammer and we went around the house putting up every single piece of artwork that had been hanging around.  Since there was so much found room we redecorated our boudoir in a Paris theme even buying a new ironing board cover in a black & white damask.  It's the little things in life that bring satisfaction!

At that same time we also hired a housekeeper.  We had never really "fully" cleaned the house since renovations were completed last spring/fall.  We found our little Filipino whirlwind through a friend; she came in for two six hour days and did a "winter cleaning" so that she would get the house off to a good start and be able to maintain it easier.  There is absolutely nothing better than coming home to a clean house once every two weeks--we all concur that she is one of the best presents we've ever given ourselves!

Hubby and I also made a new friend in the early months of this year.  HCG.  Human Chorionic Gondatropin.  Nonplussed and puzzled?  We were at first but we found out it's a hormone that is produced during pregnancy and is now being used for weight loss.  I have not owned a scale for almost 20 years and during that time refused to even consider anything that came close to the word "diet".  However, we saw a number of our friends try it and have success by keeping off the weight.  Bruce was the first guinea pig and lost 28 lbs in 21 days.  It was my turn next and I lost 25lbs in 30 days.  And.... I lost it in all the places that I wanted to lose it, just like they said I would.  Going down two dress sizes so quickly has been a little disconcerting and it meant that I had to buy new clothes.  It's probably not a painful thing for most women but I'm no shopper.  I'm still having body size clothes "confusion"--when I went to the store to buy clothes everything I picked out was way to big--it felt good in the change room but a little frustrating too.  Maintaining my new weight has not been a problem and later this month I'm looking forward to starting my second session and losing more weight.

Helping to plan dahling daughter's graduation has also been on the agenda these past few months. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.  She is organized, has her dress already, and we've worked out the details of the venue and decor.  Getting on with her "adult" life means moving forward with her step by step plans in learning to cook better by trying out new recipes, using transit, going downtown with friends and doing "adult" things like making reservations and planning events.  I've started reading articles on "empty nesting" and how I need to focus on being proud of her and proud of us as parents for raising such an independent, capable person, instead of the despair and loneliness that an empty bedroom brings....choke, hack, sigh....

So, I think that encapsulates the highlights of what has happened during the past months when I haven't been blogging.  An important step, this looking back but now it's clearly time to move forward.

Salynne
©2011

A New Design

Now that I'm back on blogger.com it's been fun to see some of the advances and changes that they have made in their formats & designs.  It seems appropriate that since I'm getting a new start with my blog there should be a style change as well.  The addition of a photo background, new colours and design is exciting and inspiring to me.  I hope you'll enjoy the changes too!

©Salynne/Susan

A Reminder to Keep a Promise

Yesterday I got a reminder from a good friend at work--she knows some of the big projects I've been working on and since she's the leader of our Closet Writers Group at work she asked, "So when have you been writing?"

"I haven't," was my answer.

"That's bad. You know it's bad for YOU."

Those words echoed in my mind all evening as I sat on the computer catching up on some work, and then later while I took a bath and read a magazine. She was right and I knew it. In March I was sick with bronchitis again, as sure sign of burn-out and overload. What did I do with my time? Write? Journal? Blog? No. I did write but not for me.

My work has been claiming a great deal of my time--I've been working on two huge projects that have been extremely satisfying. I've also been very busy with the spiritual aspect of my life and my family and that has really been what has sustained me and given me the inner satisfaction that writing also does. The set up of three other websites and the maintenance of one for a friend in exchange for his woodworking services has also meant more face time on the computer. Add in the day to day and there has not been a lot of time for writing.

Late at night and when I suffer from insomnia I've been working on the website for the Federation of BC Writers--this has been a very satisfying volunteer project but it is funny that I'm doing this all for a writing organization and the work is taking up so much time that I'm not writing. Sounds like its a pretty common issue among board volunteers for the organization too. The Federation of BC Writers Magazine, WordWorks, Fall/Winter 2010 has two articles by moi. The first one was titled Fed re-launches web site at http://www.bcwriters.ca/ . Take a look at the site--I think its beautiful and it looks fabulous compared to the old site.

The second article was entitled "Even Digital Immigrants Can Set Up a Blog" and contained a step-by-step tutorial on how to set up a blog on wordpress.com. If you'd like to see the results you can check out http://www.fedtest.wordpress.com/ . I used a fictitious author to got through the process and actually set up a blog.

Having my work edited was one of the things I enjoyed the most--I think a lot of writers find this difficult or challenging but I thought it tweaked some of those small things about my writing and I could instantly see that it made my writing better.

One of the creative things I did do was a piece of art to accompany the new website launch article. I entitled it Renewal and Growth--its a mixed media piece of art using pen & ink and computer generated images to represent the two sides of the Federation. The tree coming from the Federation Logo is very obviously representative of the growth and renewal that has been happening not only within the organization but because of the changes in the website.


The majority of the big moves and changes on the new Federation website were completed last weekend and as of this afternoon I'm starting to turn over portions of the upkeep to other volunteers. My work has also finally slowed into some kind of rhythm and last week after having four weeks off due to the bronchitis I did some readjusting of my schedule and re-committed to working from home at least one day a week.

And then my friend reminded me about writing. Earlier this morning I got out some of my journals and the three books that I was working on. Nothing was grabbing me and then I thought about Wilde Tide--a place in my imagination, the coastline wherein stories, ideas, and thoughts amass like driftwood on the shore. A blog that is a PROMISE to myself to bring more creativity into my life.....

Thanks M for reminding me.

Salynne

Dopping off the Face of the Map

So, I dropped off the face of the map for a little while. There are a couple of reasons.

First, as my previous blogs indicated, from the end of July until the end of August, I was very busy assisting my friend who was struggling with stage 4 breast cancer. Myself and two close friends were able to help her to come home from the hospital for a week so that she could spend time with her husband and dogs. On Friday, August 13th her needs became such that she was transported to a Port Moody Hospice where, embraced by her loving husband, she passed away peacefully and quietly on Sunday, August 15th. The following weeks have been a whirlwind of activity with helping to plan her memorial and helping her husband as best as we can.

In the meantime, I've been extremely busy at work with a number of very exciting projects. Most of my time has been taken up with creation of two new blogs for BC Children's Hospital; one is the BC Children's Hospital Family Centred Care Courier News Blog which is public and the other is a private member blog for the volunteer group I manage, The Partners in Care Family Advisory. As part of the social media aspect of the blogs I also created a Facebook Page and Twitter account.

Just last week, the Provincial Government released the funding for the new BC Children's Hospital that will be built over the next 5 - 10 years. This has resulted in some changes to my job as a good deal of my time will be taken up with finding volunteer families who can provide the "family voice" and feedback. The changes have already come into effect as evidenced by the fact that I'm working full-time this week on new hospital planning.

In July, I also made some decisions about where I was going with my writing and home business. I started by creating two new blogs; the setting up and populating of these has not left me a lot of time to write here. You may wish to check them out:

http://www.newwestbungalow.com/

This blog details life in our Arts and Crafts New Westminster Bungalow & features local information related to the Arts & Crafts movement, etc.

http://www.artsandcraftsenthusiast.com/

This blog is a resource of websites and events that I have found in some of my internet searchs; it will serve as a great resource for people interested in Arts & Crafts style & architecture.

Wilde Tide Press, my publishing company and new website which will feature Forever Special Friends, is not yet up and running but it's my hope that between everything else I'll have it finished by the beginning of November. Add into all of this mix the photography website I'm helping set up for my daughter, my agreement to set up another website for a friend in exchange for a piece of custom furniture, the creation of a new website for the Federation of BC Writers AND last but not least the presentation I'm preparing for a Winnipeg medical conference called "All a'Twitter--using branding, blogging and social media to connect families and staff", and you can see I have a ton on my plate. I'll try to keep up with Wilde Tide but if you don't hear from me for awhile, at least you'll know why!

Salynne©2010

Spoons

Since my last posting was food related I've decided to keep with that theme today. Here is a poem that I wrote in February at my Wednesday Closet Writers Group.

Spoons

Memories of my grandma’s kitchen
Wood carved by hand, now bent and warped
Stirring porridge or cookie dough
Sitting in the drawer amongst other utensils

Memories of my mother’s kitchen
The harsh reality of wooden pain
Brandished with angry blows, hitting my arms and legs
An ever present threat resting on the counter

Memories of my kitchen
The curved stripes of smooth olive and acacia wood
Tossing fresh baby greens and dressing
Reminders of Provence held in a Pottery vase


February 2, 2010
Salynne

The Soup Pot of Life

Sometimes life takes over....
My apologies for not posting more regularly; I got behind in postings and the soup pot of life started filling up. After the pleasure of my in-laws 50th Anniversary the news that my husbands grandmother was palliative was thrown into the mix, followed by the funeral and the family lunch afterwards. A lot of people think that I have an outgoing personality but over the past few years I've found it increasingly challenging to be with new people. Part of it, I'm sure, is that our life tends to be so full that down time with people who I'm close to is treasured. Thankfully, Keeley and I sat with Bruce's Uncle and Aunt whom I do know and love so making conversation was easy; Bruce sat with the other relatives and he had a great time too.

Looking at it from the culinary aspect of my life soup a few really large chunks of tough meat were thrown in next. The week after the funeral I got a disconcerting call from someone in the Ministry of Health telling me that their Patient Care office had a complaint about me and the department I run. Solving the systemic issue took a couple days of working full time which I'm certainly not used too.

At the same time a particular hospital department that has been making leaps and bounds in moving forward with Family Centred Care took a huge step back towards the "medical model". That chunk of meat fell uncontrollably into the pot splashing me right in the face. The next couple of weeks haven then been a mish mash of things. The directive from another part of the Ministry asking me to become involved with a "delicate" family situation was a bit of a surprise, then came the not so good news about a close workmate who is going through a very difficult family situation, concern for my daughter-in-law who was slammed with a whole lot of family bad news, sadness for the two friends who got bad medical news and sorrow when a friends mother and an elderly friend in our congregation died. Throw in a full time 8am-4pm, Monday-Friday project at work that had site wide implications for families that week and it is no wonder there was little time for blogging.

It was crazy busy but it hasn't all been bad. Keeley and I took the long weekend and headed down to Seattle for one day of shopping and two days of pure relaxation. We hit Deception Pass on the way home which is always a place where I can let absolutely everything go.

There was also the wedding of one of girl's who had been best-friends with Brenna. I thought it might be an emotional hurdle watching this last friend of hers get married but it was pleasant; very, very pleasant and all I felt was pure happiness for her, her husband and her family. I really should send a thank you note for their careful planning of the seating. We got to sit at dinner with two old friends who I have a lot in common with and don't get to visit with often. Then to our absolute delight another table mate who arrived late proved to be new acquaintance whom we'd only met a month ago but with whom there was that "instant" click of friendship. Throw in a little bit of dancing, a couple tears shed when the groom started to cry during the speeches and the soup was pretty tasty that evening!

Then 10 days later her brother got married so we attended another lovely wedding which you could call icing on the cake or some additional flavouring to the soup. Our convention followed, we spent a few days in Kamloops which of course always clears my head and thinking. Spending time with my best friend is always balm for my soul. It was during this time that I was able to make some decisions about the future of my current job, my plans for my author website & online business and future goals when it comes to writing. Clarity is always a good and tasty thing.

We had a lovely week of holidays and visit with my husbands parents shortly thereafter and I planned to start blogging again. Then we got news that my congregation friend who was diagnosed with breast cancer in the fall of 2008 was in the hospital with organ failure. Since then I've been either at the hospital or assisting to get things set up in their home. K**** is considered palliative but she has a strong will to live and despite her doctors prognosis she is determined to extend her life.

My summer soup pot is overflowing with experiences, both good and not so good. One thing is for sure, it will certainly be a soup/summer to remember.

Salynne ©2010

I Love You a Bushel & a Peck

My apologies for not writing over the past month. Things have been busy at work but I have also been suffering from writers block. For the past month I have not been able to write because I have been mourning the loss of someone very special in my life. The following is what came out because of the encouragement I received from my Closet Writers group at work and the opportunity I had tonight at my other writing group to get this down on paper.

I Love You a Bushel & a Peck

Grandma Minnie died last month. She was ninety-two. She wasn't my relation but my husband's grandmother. All of my grandparents had died by the time I was twenty-five so that element of aged wisdom was missing from my life until she came in to it. I treasured Minnie and I loved her because she became my Grandma too.

Minnie was everything a grandmother should be; warm, inviting, ready to wrap you in a hug at a moments notice. She cooked, sewed and canned showing us younger women how it was done. Her homemaking skills were a product of a bygone era when women's rights and equality didn't have a lot of meaning. Most people today would, of course, consider her old-fashioned but I always found comfort in her domesticity and her warm, fresh from the oven cookies. Whenever Bruce and I visited, we women-folk would do the dishes after dinner while the men would go play pool in the basement. Then we would sit in the warm kitchen and play a board game or perhaps sit and chat about local goings on while her knitting needles clacked harmoniously with the sounds of the crickets and night birds.

The last time I saw Minnie she was in the lock down area of a seniors home. Diagnosed with dementia several years previously she needed a safe place and constant care. One of the nurses told me before I went in to visit her that even though she might not remember who I was she was a delightful, happily confused tenant. When I entered Grandma Minnie's room she was laying on her bed reading and re-reading a letter from her daughter, my husbands mother.

She looked up at me. "Well Hello".

"Hello Minnie. It is so good to see you. I've missed you", I said.

Confusion registered on her face and I could see her struggling to remember who I was.

"I'm Susan, your grandson's wife".

"Susan. Well, I like your face. You look like a nice person. I think I like you. Come sit beside me". I did as I was told.

Minnie started to sing, "I love you a bushel and a peck, a bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck." She reached over and hugged me. Then she held my face between her hands. "Yes, I like your face. I can tell you are a nice person. I LOVE YOU. I love you a bushel and a peck, a bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck."

I stayed for another twenty minutes. I tried to make small talk about her lovely room and asked her how she liked living there. She would start a sentence and then her brow would furrow because she just couldn't hold on to the thought and express what she wanted to say. She would drift off and comment on the weather or talk about her slippers and then sing a bushel and a peck and hug me again. When it was time to go I gave her a final hug and said goodbye.

Walking out of the building tears sprung up in my eyes, not because I was sad, but because I left feeling that somewhere deep down Minnie could sense that I loved her and despite her failing memory I think she felt love for me. Today I look at the photos that I took of her that day, grateful that I captured her happy and grateful that I have a visual portrait of those cherished last moments with her. Yes, I loved her a bushel and a peck, a bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck.

Salynne ©2010